LIFE CHOICES: ENMITY OR KINDNESS?
Matthew 5: 43-45; Galatians 5: 16-23
It was baseball player
and dry wit philosopher, Yogi Berra, who once confused
listeners with this sage advice: “When you come to a fork in the road, take it!” It was American poet, Robert Frost, who made
the idea of making right choices significant with his famous line: “Two roads diverged into the wood, and I, I
took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” And it
was the Lord God who, through Moses in Deuteronomy, said to all who were
listening: “I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse:” And then
God offers this wonderful piece of advice: “Choose
life! Then you and your descendents will live.”
Every day we make choices: what clothes should I wear; what shall I
eat; when will I call it a night? Only
children, unable to make wise choices without a parent’s guidance, generally
have less say on these questions. But through life, the questions get harder: Will
I take this test and cheat or study and do the best I can? Will I keep having
these friends even though they always get me into trouble? Will I tryout for
cheerleading or run for student government, or join the French Club or do all
of them? Will I be in Boy Scouts and try out for basketball and join the Flying
Club or just do some or none of them? (I actually did all three in high
school.) Every weekend, someone is deciding whether or not to take a drink, and
if they do, whether they will then drive under the influence of alcohol.
Sometime along the way you may have chosen to stay with a boyfriend or
girlfriend or to break up. On the other hand, someone may have broken up with
you which is one of the most difficult hurts for
teenagers and college aged students to overcome. Some say, when they lose their
patience or their temper, that another driver or a husband, wife, child, or
friend made them do it. No; no one has the power to cause your bad behavior. Only you
allow your bad behavior. I hate it when I cannot blame my behavior on someone else
as much as you do! I could parade a dozen specialists in front of you today-
psychotherapists, pastoral counselors, even 12 Step Program mentors – and they
would agree with that statement. Life is full of choices, and behavior is one
of them. How you feel carries no
moral weight; how you act does. Today
and the rest of this month the sermon series is on LIFE CHOICES.
As we begin, the first question juxtaposes a term from Paul’s
the “works of the flesh” list: enmity,
with one term from the “fruit of the Spirit” list: kindness. “Enmity” is, as you
might surmise by looking at the word, “is a posture of making enemies of
others.” “Kindness” on the other hand,
has its roots in the Old Testament, the Hebrew word “hesed”
which means “steadfast love,” or “kindness.” Sometimes neighbors become
enemies, perhaps out of different viewpoints, or from rudeness, or from
stubbornness. When you make enemies, your body, mind and soul, all of them, go
through physical, emotional, and spiritual changes. Enmity has been documented
to bring about physical symptoms: not only does one’s soul get troubled when
one has enemies, one’s mind gets troubled so that sleep gets interrupted, life
gets so filled with maddening distractions so that one can hardly function, and
smiles go away from everyone’s faces involved. Our bodies go into “fight or
flight” mode, a reflex intended to help in an emergency, but not intended to be
used for weeks or months on end. Those
in threatening situations are often tortured by a syndrome called Post Traumatic
Stress Disorder for years of their life. Fighting enemies, whether another
condo owner, or a bully at school, or your mother in law, or law breakers if
you are on a police force or the system if you are a social worker, all of that
is stressful. Enmity also causes health care costs and pharmaceutical profits
to rise as medications are used in quantity for headaches, chest pains, stomach
problems and indigestion. There may be
times when enmity is a necessary evil:
“Americans have traditionally stood firm against enemies, both foreign
and domestic, as military officers and presidents have taken aim at enemies in
An alternative path to take in life is kindness. We might call it love, a means of grace that the King
James translates as “charity.” Some of the best charitable (unselfish, caring
for others) events have been from eclectic sources: pop stars have sung to feed
hungry people in
When Paul the Apostle wrote the words in Galatians on the
works of the flesh and the works of the Spirit, he had witnessed both of them
first hand. The members of that early Galatian church
were acting more like they were led by the flesh
instead of the Spirit. Some in our
day act that way too. This Roman citizen, Paul, who was a Jew who turned
Christian, had found a way to look at life and at others differently after his
conversion. Paul, for the first time in his life, saw the possibilities, the
potential, and the positive nature that others could have if they claimed
Christ and acknowledged that God loved them.
Sometimes I have run in to those true “born again” people; no, not the
ones that bash you on the heads with their Bibles and judge your
Baptism and your salvation, I mean the ones who, at one time, were fighters
against Christ or at least apathetic about Christ and his teachings, then one
day they get it! The scales fall from their eyes; they go from having desires
of the flesh to desires of the Spirit. They begin to care about others instead
of living in the infantile stage of self. I wonder if Paul Newman, or even Millard
Fuller, a lawyer on the brink of divorce who gave up on law but not on his
marriage to help poor people get a home, I wonder if they had conversion
experiences? Fuller has had his personal problems, so we can choose to shun him
or appreciate him: we have life choices too.
What I DO notice from some prominent politicians and preachers is that
those who condemn the loudest are among those whose personal sins are later exposed
or whose judgmentalism squeezes all the juice out of the
“fruits of the Spirit.” We are not to live as victims of circumstances, nor are
we to live as Monday morning quarterbacks, analyzing the “plays” of others
perfectly, but never casting a glance on our own sins. It is exasperating to be
around those people for very long. Our life comes down to choices, not down to
blame or criticism. How are you doing with your life choices? Are you busy making enemies, or making friends? Are you busy making
noise or are you busy making a difference? Are busy making people mad or are
you making them glad they know you? Take
responsibility for yourself and your actions. Do the tough work of being honest
with yourself. Acknowledge that you cannot change
others, only the way you react to others. And then try some fruit for a change,
perhaps some love, joy, peace, or patience; maybe a taste of gentleness and
self-control. But this week, try kindness; people
can be unreasonable; try it anyway.
Paul believed it so much that he made the list right after the works of
the flesh list: the first list made him sick about the Galatians; the second
list gave him hope. Perhaps God thinks that way about us. I’ll close with these words from Mother Teresa:
“
“We are all capable of good and evil. We are
not born bad: everybody has something good inside.
Some hide it, some neglect it, but it is there. God created us to love and to
be loved, so it is our test from God to choose one path or the other…This
shouldn’t be such a struggle to achieve.”
[A SIMPLE PATH, 1995, P. 51] Jeffrey A. Sumner